And if you just heard a loud ripping sound, that was the sound of a giant band-aid being ripped off my eyes. I have been wanting, agonizing, procrastinating and delaying launching myself out there for WAAAY too long! So, ready or not world, here I come!
"...there is no fear, there is peace here. I have found a home."
I turn 35 years old in two days. I am not one of those people that worries about getting old, but I am kind of anxious about this birthday. The past nine months, especially this week leading up to the 'ol b-day has sucked. Luckily, this is the story of what came from it.
And so I went for a jog tonight. Had a rough day and wanted to put on some good music and jog-it-out. Half way through my run I Am Strong by Tiesto came on the iPod, and...well, everything kind of changed.
I'm a jewelry designer and an artist. I'm happiest when I'm expressing myself creatively--whether through my jewelry, fashion, my home, and {I'm lucky enough to say} through my "day job". But what I really want to do is to fully support myself as a jewelry designer!! RIIP! There goes another band-aid.
So...back to my jog. I Am Strong comes on, and I'm literally moved. I'm lucky it's dark out because I'm running with my arms stretched out wide, moving to the music. And I listen to the words...
...look at me, here I am...
...you will make me strong...
...I am not alone...
...look at me, here I am...
...there is no fear, there is peace here...
...I have found a home...
WOW. And I realize, as I'm running, that this is the day. I've been waiting for the "perfect" moment to launch myself out there. But this song, it screams, when is "perfect" ever going to happen--just do it! Okay. F%@# it!!* This is the day that I check the fear of putting myself out there at the door, and I go out into the bright light of the world.
{Serious moment} Before I go, I just want to say thank you to my treasured loves. You are my solids. And you have shown me true love and friendship, and I am forever changed because of you.
...look at me, here I am...
...you will make me strong...
...I am not alone...
...there is no fear, there is peace here...
...I am home...
good night my beloved
*Okay, out of principle I couldn't put down a four letter word on my FIRST post, could I? Truth is, I really like to swear! So, yeah... fuck it! Welcome to jungle baby!!
Lyrics to I am Strong by Tiesto
Struggle to get on
And you know me, understand me
You will make me strong
You will make me strong
You will make me strong
Look at me, here I am
Reaching for your arms again
I saw the hurt and all the pain
And get back on my feet again
Hear you sighing through the crying
I am not alone
Cause he see me, want to be me
Melancholy so
Melancholy so
Look at me, here I am
Reaching for your arms again
I saw the hurt and all the pain
And get back on my feet again
Dez, Nove, Oito, Sete, Seis, Cinco, Quatro, Três, Dois, Um
There is no fear, there is peace here
I have found a home
Look at me, here I am (I am strong, I'm not alone)
Reaching for your arms again
I saw the hurt and all the pain (I am strong, I'm not alone)
And get back on my feet again
I am strong, I'm not alone (I am strong, I'm not alone)
I am strong, I'm not alone
Look at me, here I am
Reaching for your arms again
I saw the hurt and all the pain
And get back on my feet again
Look at me, here I am (I am strong, I'm not alone)
Reaching for your arms again
I saw the hurt and all the pain (I am strong, I'm not alone)
And get back on my feet again
I am strong, I'm not alone (I am strong, I'm not alone)
I am strong, I'm not alone
